When it seems like the night will last forever

Maybe a foreshadowing of the winter season slowly waiting to make its arrival with the last days of summer upon us slowly approaching fall, but kind of a melancholy soaked weekend for me with no real explanation for it that comes to mind other than just that - an awareness of the inevitable change in seasons and loss of daylight hours. A time to meditate on how to deal with grief and sadness as they are inevitable feelings for me. I was out in the backyard hitting on an Am into Bm in open position and came up with some ramblings which I am trying to remember here to the best that I can.

Mantra theme - It's gonna go away

I am outside with a heavy heart, tears fill my eyes in this all too familiar part
Grief paints the day like a darkened paintbrush, looking for love but I can't seem to get enough
Everything I once felt is still with me, my soul hasn't left it is still a part of me
God is till here, Godess is still here, my love is still here, my faith is still here
What I feel now will not last forever, it is going to pass on like the stormy weather
Like the change in the wind, like the change in the seasons
Like the change of emotions, change from happy to grieving
It's all a part of this vast ocean soul, adjusting the sails to this dark, empty hole
The tears in my eyes like a gallon of water that my soul drinks down to quench a thirsty hunger
To feel all the feelings I need to be feeling, to deal with emotions I need to be dealing with
I need to be happy, but I need to be sad, I need to cry now just like I need to be glad
It's all a part of miracles of emotion, to know my self in surrendur devotion
To see the ying and yang of the entire picture, feel the strength of my heart when it's under water
To allow myself to cry, to tell myself it's all okay, feel the light in the tunnel at the end of the day
Life and death different sides of the coin of the one, the grief will end though only now just begun
I can float to the land if I believe in my spirit, it is with me now though I can't see and hear it
Gotta keep on believing, when the light is dim, moving on when I forget how to push, how to swim
It is going to pass, it is going to part, I'll return to that beautiful place inside my heart
I'm allowed to grieve, I'm allowed to cry, I'm allowed to question, I'm allowed to ask why
But I don't need the answer that I'll never have, I don't need to know why I'm now feeling sad
I just breathe out and surrendur in this refuge of sod, I can see different faces in the one head of God
I can still see the wonder with the tears in my eye, I can still see the beauty of the deep blue sky
I can still know the great spirit is here with me now, when I look up to see those thin hazy white clouds
Cus I still belive, though I don't feel like believing, I still am happy, though right now I am grieving
This change in my spirits - lasting hours or days, but it doesn't mean that faith has to go away
I still love you, I still need to be loved, I still feel the spirits in the heavens above
I can cry, I can mourn, I can sleep through the day, till I reach the place where it all goes away
This is the time to take extra care, of my needs, of my soul, of the feelings I wear
On my sleeve, on my face, in my heart, in my head, I surrendur to death, but I don't need to be dead
It is all life now and I know I am okay, I know there is refuge at the end of the day
In my dreams, in my heart, in my songs, my guitar - in my healing place to live out unhealed scars
I still believe in you my beautiful one, I still know another song waits to be sung
I still can say the things I need to say, I still know I have my spirit, soul and my faith
I feel it now, but it's gonna go away, I feel it now but it's gonna go away
I feel it now, but it's gonna go away, I feel it now but it's gonna go away.....